I’ve often been told that keeping it simple is best; it has greater impact. As a leader, nothing could be simpler, shorter and more powerful than using the one letter word, “I.”
“I” versus “You”
Generally speaking, people tend to speak about their personal thoughts using the word ‘you.’ There are many reasons for this which we won’t go into now. Suffice it to say that if you listen intently to people speaking, you will most often hear them using the word ‘you’ in their conversations. Rarely will you hear them using the word “I.” Observe your own dialogue. What do you find yourself using most often?
When you use the word ‘you,’ you are, on a subconscious level, placing responsibility and ownership of what is going on in your mind to something outside of yourself. This can be dis-empowering. Most people are unaware they are doing this until it is pointed out to them. I witness this a lot when I am facilitating a class, or training people on group dynamics. When people use the word ‘you’ in their statements, I ask them to repeat what they have just said by replacing any ‘you’ with an ‘I.’ They look at me, shocked. They are typically unaware of their choice of words. Once they actually restate their comment using ‘I,’ the impact is fairly quick. They experience what they are saying differently as they become more conscious and deliberate in their expression. This increases their ability to affect the changes they value. For more information check out: https://www.
Personal Power
This might not seem to be such a big deal, but it is. When you use the word “I” instead of “you,” you will find yourself experiencing greater personal power. You will lead from your personal authority and inspire people by your authenticity.
Using “I” statements puts you in the driver’s seat for change in your life. Instead of making someone else responsible for what you are thinking, you are taking ownership of your own thoughts. You are making it clear to yourself and those who are listening to you, that your thoughts belong to you. When you own your thoughts, you have the power to shift them to better serve you. Therein lies your power.
Authority
In addition to experiencing greater personal power, “I” statements enable you to establish a high level of personal authority. Your actions are in alignment with your thoughts. You are clear within yourself about what you believe and understand. This breeds a confidence which can translate well when communicating with and leading others, especially when you have to encourage your team to achieve a goal way beyond anything they’ve ever done.
Authenticity
Leading from a position of personal power and authority communicates authenticity which is essential when successfully leading people. When those you lead know what you stand for, there is a greater level of trust in what you are saying. They know they can rely on what you are telling them. It establishes integrity and helps those whom you lead to feel confident because they can expect that your words and actions will be in alignment. This sense of security can provide a greater willingness on their part, to engage in innovative behavior which is a hallmark for a healthy, thriving business.
Make a Shift
When you make the simple shift from using “you” to “I” in your communications, you experience greater personal power, authority and authenticity. You put yourself in the driver’s seat for change in your life. You don’t take on other people’s opinions, and you don’t give other people your opinions. This stimulates a greater willingness for people within a group to share and work together. When you lead from this space of personal integrity you add a depth and richness to your leadership style. Plus, the more comfortable you are with using “I” statements, the more you can encourage and motivate your team to do the same. Isn’t that what makes an impactful leader?
A simple word — a powerful impact — “I”
Rebecca Victor and Your Joyful Path, 2012 to the present date: Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Rebecca Victor and Your Joyful Path with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.